Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Advice for my 14 year old self - The final one!

Thank you for reading along as I shared the most important things I have learned in the last 25 years.  It has been quite a journey getting here and quite a journey looking back.  Every one of these points came from my own life experiences from travelling, relationships, good times, not so good times and everything else that makes up the web of my life.

This last piece of advice has been so important and life changing for me I felt it needed to stand alone and not be lost among fourteen other points.  It came into my life when I was 29 and it has changed every relationship I have and made me rethink so many experiences.  I hope it will do the same for you.


76.  Change your language from 'They did that to me' to 'They did that'.  Refuse to own someone else's bad behaviour.


Think about how many times you have said 'I can't believe he/she did that TO ME' or 'How can you do this TO ME?' and adjust your language.  You will soon be able to let so many things go when you take the arrogance out of what other people do and you refuse to own what they are doing.  When you accept that people do things yet you dont need to participate or make it about yourself, you will realise how easy it is let it go, walk away and live a happy life.

"When you think everything is someone else´s fault, you will suffer a lot. When you realize that everything springs only from yourself, you will learn both peace and joy. Pride leads to violence and evil. The truly good gaze upon everything with love and understanding"  ~The Dalai Lama


Have a fabulous day!

17 comments:

Sweet Southern Prep said...

Another great list! Time to print these all off now. Thanks! :)

Scottish Twins said...

What an excellent post. And it's a really important thing to teach our children, because we live in a society where people always want to play the victim and whenever things go wrong we find anyone to blame but ourselves.

Thanks again for this wonderful series of posts!

A Texas Gal said...

I have read each of these posts and I love this one the most. Thank you for posting. As a 27 year old navigating dating and love and loss and all the joys and sorrows it can bring - this is such a good way to look at everything.

Jordyn said...

Thanks for doing this series...I really enjoyed it! I totally agree with all:)

Miss Janice said...

This is a standing joke at my house..."husband" always says "I know, it's MY fault!" :)

Suburban Princess said...

Miss Janice - mine just asks me to tell him how whatever it is, is his fault rather than making him guess lol!

the pink prep said...

oh my, oh my, oh my! What a fabulous, empowering, beautiful, insightful full-course list! well-said. All of it. from the faux gin & tonic, to the "supplies" needed when you pack a bikini, to letting go .... what lessons we all could have benefited from at 14, or, um 36!
i remember when i was 21, and got my first "real" out-of-college job in southern tennessee and i had my first story was about an oil-drilling auger! (with a fashion journalism degree, how in the WORLD was I going to write about that?!?) my editor told me to go at it like I was covering fashion week for Vogue, and make it the best story I could... he is still one of my dearest friends today, and totally taught me the lesson of approaching something without pre-conceived notions!
ps -- SATC totes at walmart?! might just have to check those out!! :-)

North of 25A said...

How wish you are, my dear!

JulesTX said...

You are so right about this last one. It totally changes the responsibility by not including yourself.
I need to take this one to heart.

Thanks for the list, it is great, regardless of age.

Leslie @ A Blonde Ambition said...

I have so enjoyed reading this series! So inspiring and refreshing!

High Heeled Life said...

This is truly a very important one! I have enjoyed this series- and often found myself stopping to think about how it all applies as reminders to our older self too!Stay cool in this wonderful hot weather!

melissa said...

A - I have truly enjoyed reading your advice series. Wonderful list and I agree!!!

Jules said...

Excellent! Love this.

Kim Reese said...

These posts have been wonderful!! Thank you so much for sharing!

Trish said...

You know I adore you and this entire series, I'm telling you, now we just need a publisher, you are so wise and I love your perspective!! :) xoxoxo

Snooty Primadona said...

It's all about attitude & how you see life, right?

I loved the Dali Lama quote...

LPC said...

This is undoubtedly one of the most important things I have learned. In my entire life. Couldn't agree with you more.